What Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna failed to convey..

Marriage in Indian society is seen as an honored responsibility, a family obligation, extension of social ties, in some cases a fruitful conclusion of long revered love and more importantly a chance to add a different dimension to one’s personality where sacrifice and flexibility should rule over one’s ego , self centeredness and his/her own happiness. The ancient Upanishads and Vedas saw Grihashtya life as the one where a person has the opportunity to pay back to family and society in large by practicing all teachings and values of Brahmacharya life in real world. Perhaps these inculcated values that have passed on through generations are one of the primary reasons why Indian marriages have high success rate compared to its contemporaries across the globe.


Unfortunately, Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna failed to convey any of the virtues that hold a marriage together or in rather larger perspective any relation for that matter. It might be over sightedness or lack of reality check on part of script writer to convey what he wanted to say. Marriages are definitely made in heaven and more often than not people end up with partners contrary to their expectations, their life style, their thinking, and their personality. It could be seen as a divine test of character whether one can find fruits amidst the adversity. Yet if one starts pricking his partner’s self respect time and again, test his/her patience and more importantly starts creating a gulf of mistrust and hatred , I suspect whether he would ever live happily with any one else.


By glorifying the cause of two protagonists – Maya and Dev- who seemed totally at wrong pedestal, the script writer has failed to understand the very essence of any relationship. To start with the character of Maya, a somber, melancholic girl who sees darkness even in bright sunlight never ever thought beyond the confines of her self centeredness. In form of Rishi she had the best husband one could ever wish to have- Loving, charming, adjustable and more importantly able to ignore her fallacy and shortcomings. Yet for some unknown reasons which hardly seemed convincing she never gets along with Rishi. It is beyond anybody’s comprehension what exactly she wanted. Right from the day of her marriage, she shows signs of cribbing, apprehensiveness and anxiety which perhaps any newly bride would encounter. Most of them take this as a passing phase and wish for a better future. The character of Maya never seemed to get over this emotional conflict through out her married life for some eerie reasons. Was it her immaturity or was she never ever emotionally strong to get married? These thought kept floating in nebular silhouette of Maya.

The ultimate test of any relation is how you can share happiness and sorrow alike of your partner. There was couple of instances where Maya showed how weak her emotional quotient is. When Rishi’s father throws a party, rather than behaving as a daughter of the family and getting actively involved in the celebration, Maya prefers to draw herself in reclusive world. Definitely it’s upon ones own taste whether he/she likes socializing, party etc. But what her family just wanted was her bubbly presence which she never understood. Besides that at the moment of greatest tragedy when Rishi’s father expires and he was at his emotionally weakest point, Maya prefers to cut loose the Pandora box when the situation demanded her to be standing by the side of Rishi.

There are umpteen moments when one lets down his or her partner, breaks the trust and stray out of the way. Yet there has to be an understanding to learn the difference between hiding and bluffing – especially when the situation demands so. The situation demanded Maya to support her husband at the moment of crisis, dump her past in some closet and start afresh. And here is where the characterization of a woman fails. Any woman is far stronger emotionally and mentally to sustain the trauma at time of adversity. She is the one who takes the onus to face the calamity which strikes her family and relation. Without uttering many things she conveys the persona of fortitude and strong will. Here is where Maya never resembles a woman that we know in our society. Rishi’s marriage was not a failure, he married a failed person, and probably he was better off getting rid of her.


Perhaps, Dev’s character was more to realism considering a male ego which more often than not can’t see his partner as more successful. Yet his constant nagging and trite on Riya or for that matter even on Maya showed there was always a diabolical intent in his personality. Riya took the responsibility of the family for the good when Dev was crippled. Yet Dev demanded something which no body could understand. What exactly he wanted? Riya’s rebuttal on Dev’s remark that she is not a caring mother best exemplified her sensibility and level headedness. Dev couldn’t see the sacrifice she was making personally and professionally. It was not about Maya that drew him close to her. In fact his infidel state of mind could have got hold of anybody available in the proverbial park.


Even under professional pressure Riya was more willing to work out her marriage, do her bit in every aspect and help out Dev. But Dev seemed to get bored with her after spending so many years that he couldn’t find love and affection in what Riya was doing for him. He was not only responsible for breaking his relation but also instigated Maya to forfeit her responsibilities. His clandestine motive was probably evident only in the eyes of Rishi’s father. I suspect whether he would have ever continued his relation with Maya far more than a “Spring” season. Such people are the most dangerous species for not only a family but for any relation. They roam around the streets in clothes of sheep, wearing mistrust on their sleeves. Riya’s final subjugation lie in her words when she tells Maya that Maya would understand the true meaning of sufferings when she will start living with Dev.

Finally by allowing the union of both Maya and Dev – the scriptwriter has allowed a nebular conclusion to follow. Was it right on the part of Maya to leave Rishi at the moment of crisis? Was it correct on Dev’s part to follow the same path which forced the situation that he had to be kicked out of the house? And finally was Maya’s character so fickle and weak that she would allow the proceedings which broke her family, her marriage, and her happiness to overwhelm her? None of this could we all comprehend.

As a last word, those who believe that you should marry only whom you love, fail to understand one very facet of life. This love, affection, infatuation, liking etc is never everlasting. You can keep drooling about your partner’s eyes, his/her persona, his behavior for year or two or may be three. Once it fizzes out after that what? It all boils down to sacrifice, commitments, obligations, reinventing oneself, taking measures to develop new avenues of love, adjustments, flexibility, understanding and more so trust and belief that you won’t get a better partner than this one. Saying love is the only parameter that makes a marriage work is dubious and sacrilege remark on such a sacrosanct institution. Probably the best essence of the film would have been -Never say Alvida to your life partner come what may be.